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If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow.
Chinese Proverb

Anger could cause big problems. A problem that is small in the beginning could become bad if we handle it with anger. Not only will the situation itself get worse, our relationships with others could also deteriorate. In short, handling something with anger won’t make things better.

How to Control Anger That’s why it’s essential to control anger. By controlling anger we will be able to handle problems with calm. We can then exercise our wisdom and judgment to the problem at hand to achieve the best possible solution. Being someone who sometimes gets angry, there are some tips I find useful on dealing with anger. Here they are – choose the ones that work for you:

1. Take a deep breath

Taking a deep breath is an easy way to calm your nerves. It will be easier for you to do the other tips when your anger has subsided.

2. Drink a glass of water

It’s also an easy way to calm your nerves.

3. Take a bath

I know it is not possible in many circumstances, but if you can do it the effect is immediate.

4. Don’t speak while you are angry

If you did so you may speak harshly to others and that could be something you regret. There is a nice quote about it:

When angry, count ten before you speak; if very angry, a hundred.
Thomas Jefferson

5. Listen to what people say

Continuing the previous tip, not only should we not speak while we are angry, we should also learn to listen. Pay attention and try to understand the point the other person makes.

6. Take a walk

Changing your situation is a good way to overcome anger. One way to do so is by taking a walk outside.

7. Pray or meditate

Praying or meditating is an effective way to calm your nerve. It could help you regain your inner peace.

8. Listen to calming music

My favorite is instrumental music since it seems to have better calming effect but you can use whatever music that works for you.

9. Have realistic expectations

Sometimes we are angry simply because we have unrealistic expectations toward others. Make sure that your expectations are realistic. You can’t expect other people to be like you.

10. Realize that nobody is perfect

Everybody can make mistake including you. Realizing this will make it easier for you to understand when someone makes mistakes.

11. See from the other person’s perspective

One way to do that is by asking yourself: “How do I feel if I’m in his or her position?”

12. Tell a wise friend

Sometimes you just need to talk about it with a wise friend. He or she can help you see the problem in the right perspective. Just be careful to choose the right person.

13. Look at the positive side

This is a habit you should build. The habit of looking at the positive side will help you look at many situations in constructive ways.

14. Exercise

You can control anger by directing your energy to a different direction so that it’s no longer available for anger. A good candidate is exercising.

15. Learn to forgive

If you release forgiveness you will no longer have reasons to angry to someone else. You can then focus on positive ways to solve the problem.

16. Think in long term

Often we are angry because we see too near to the future and do not think about the implications in the long term. By seeing in the long term we will be able to see the consequences of anger. There’s a quote I love about it:

When anger rises, think of the consequences.
Confucius

***

How do you control anger? Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments.

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Photo by Alejandra Mavroski


Categories: Attitude

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  • dharashree

    Thank you for these excellent tips to control anger. I am a 22 year girl doing MA in journalism. I always loose my temper while any body not listen me.Your easy steps make me feel good in my day to day life.but i have some other tips to control anger that is while you get angry you just sit and think about past days when you achieved something.Think about your childhood.Think about any memorable and happiest moment of your life.Try these steps you definitely feel good and it make you smile on your face. THANKS

  • http://www.ohcr.com bilal

    these all are very effective ways!!thnx for sharing.i foucus sometimes on no.14 by taking my bat and tennis ball in my hand and go outside and hit the wall with ball with so much power that after few moments my anger get away!!any way thnx again….!

  • jesse

    thx so much, i am a 13 year old boy and just got kicked out of my school untill i can controll my self and these tips seem really useful. thx again
    =]

  • inayat ullah niazi

    I take exercise early in the morning daily .No rest day.
    I keep changing the type of exercise and locations.If anger overcome me i say to my self,a sort of self suggestion “i have got rid of all kinds of mental pressure”.I count this on my finger tips.After some time i feel relax.storm of anger vanishes….These are magical words.I TAKE DEEP BREATH for 12 times..i imagine that power ful healthy fresh air is entering my body..this also helps to control mind.Good habits..positive thinking also helps lot..

  • Joyce

    Thank you so much for your 16 Simple Tips on Dealing with Anger. I really have a problem in controlling my anger. I’m a short-tempered type of person. Your tips will be very much helpful to me. :)

  • Sam

    Thanks so much for the awesome tips, will def’ be using a few of these during school.

  • Fraser

    thanks a lot for these. another thing i’ve learnt is that playing an instrument also tends to calm me down

  • http://www.tetimardiana.blogspot.com Teti Mardiana

    Thanks for the article, very useful.

  • http://hotmail.ca mel

    Thx you very helpfull i will try all of them……but will be hard at the heat of the moment when im mad!!!16 is the one i will try the hardest to remember, thats the one that could change things before i speak when mad…it will be a chalenge cuz my hole life when im mad im dramatic, will be weired to not speak up… but willing to try to save my famely….thx

  • Delana

    These tips will change my life

    • http://www.lifeoptimizer.org/2008/05/02/how-to-control-anger-tips-on-dealing-with-anger/ Hannah

      How would it change your life Delana?

  • Sonal

    Thank u so much hope they work effectively

  • http://www.lifeoptimizer.org/2008/05/02/how-to-control-anger-tips-on-dealing-with-anger/ Hannah

    good going,but it won’t help my friends at scool
    or work.

  • omar

    thank u for the information its good i can apply this specially to my brother .. hehehe and all the people who annoys me … :)

  • nivetha

    hi i am nivetha .i could not control my anger.everyone around me would always think me as a short temper but after reading these tips i feel i could control my anger .bye

  • nivetha

    thanks for the tips and I am 13

  • Taylo

    i have problem with my anger and my parents i am 10

  • http://www.aces-counseling.com/ DUI evaluation

    Thank you for sharing these easy anger management tips. I sometimes find myself in the height of my anger that I tend to aggravate the situation. When I finally realize it, the damage has been done. So, thank you for these posts. I will surely keep these tips in mind and try to practice them.

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