There are times when we must go through negative situations. Maybe people say something negative about us, or they show rejection or even resentment against us. In such situations, it may be difficult to stay positive. We may be inclined to react negatively to them. That won’t do us any good though; doing so will just make the situation worse. People may behave even more negatively to us. Our day would be filled with anger and disappointment. At the end, nobody wins.
Though it’s not easy, it’s important to stay positive in negative situations. Beat the negative situations by staying positive. Here are 15 tips on how to do it; pick the ones that work for you:
- Never respond when you are not calm. If you are not sure that you are calm, don’t respond. Take time to calm yourself down first.
- Take a deep breath as a first step to calm yourself down.
- Speak in gentle tone to reduce the tension of the situation.
- Realize that you can find opportunities in negative situations. Albert Einstein said: “In the middle of every difficulty lies opportunity.”
- Look at the content of what people say to you for something positive that you can act upon to improve yourself. Don’t just reject the whole messages.
- For the rest of the messages which is negative, simply ignore it.
- Maintain positive view of the people. Maybe you don’t like their messages or behavior, but that doesn’t mean that you can hate them personally.
- Realize that having negative feelings will just hurt you, not them. So there is no reason for you to have any negative feeling.
- If you make mistakes, be open to admit it.
- If you make mistakes, remember this quote by George Bernard Shaw: “A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.”
- If you can, listen to motivational audio program to feed positive thoughts into your mind.
- Talk to a positive friend who can encourage you.
- Remember your favorite quotes to give you inspiration and motivation. This is one reason why you should have quote of the day.
- Look at the negative situations as your training sessions for real life. The higher you climb in life, the worse the negative situations would be, so you’d better be prepared for them.
- Realize that you can’t please everyone. In fact, nobody can. Sometimes you need to just let some people go. Realizing this will relieve you from a lot of unnecessary burden so that you can focus on the people that you can positively interact with.
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Comment by @Stephen
#1 11. September 2007, 5:59 am o'clock |
These are great tips, and I’d like to offer one more: always remember that even though you may be in a negative situation, you have the ability to remain positive in the first place. Knowing that possibility exists is half of the battle.
Comment by David
#2 11. September 2007, 11:42 am o'clock |
Hi Donald! While living a life as near to positive as possible, negativity doesn’t have to have a clearly negative effect :)
By that I mean, a person grows not just from their positive experiences but also by the not so positive. We learn, therefore, from our “mistakes.” I agreed going off the deep end is not a great way to handle things, and I also know that sometimes “righteous?” anger can be a good thing even if in the moment it doesn’t seem like it.
Comment by Donald Latumahina
#3 12. September 2007, 1:05 pm o'clock |
Stephen,
You are right, knowing that we have such ability can greatly help us stay positive. We should not let situations take control of our life. Instead, we should take control of the situations by staying positive.
David,
I agree with you. Negative experiences may in fact teach us more than positive experiences. It is our attitude that should remain positive so that we can learn as much as possible from those negative experiences.
Comment by Isadora
#4 16. September 2007, 8:54 pm o'clock |
But we must also realize that people can be evil and manipulative. They have their own motives as to their attitudes toward you. Realize that if you work under a woman a lot of “6th grade, she said, she did, crap” will inevitably follow. There is no advice out there to solve the boss’s mental issues. Just realize that no matter what they don’t dictate who you are! This article is filled with great advice but its easier said than done. Calm down, cry if you have to in privacy, take walk, come back to office without being seen by said mean person and get back to work… coffee is a comfort to me … even grabbing a bite to eat helps… you won’t want to eat, talk or look at anyone but let the moment pass…. put a smile on the next time you see them… it always confuses them as to why your no upset… thats my best advice that is left out from this article… use it wisely from one who got her position from the higher ups because I was more qualified than the boss’s best friend. Good Luck!
Comment by kenneth daniels
#5 30. September 2007, 12:57 am o'clock |
I took alot from your post. I have a problem in a negative situation of taking it as a personal attack.
It could be critical information that I should grow from lf I just get
past the point of taking it personal.
I must realize I cannot please everyone & everyone is not looking out for my well being. In this world some people are sicker than others. I must cling to the positive & not let negative
people drag me down.
Every experience there is something to take from lt, even if I
have to meditate on it for awhile to figure out what it is
Comment by Donald Latumahina
#6 1. October 2007, 4:43 am o'clock |
Isadora,
You’re right, doing the tips in this post are easier said than done. And yes, there are things that we cannot control. I believe that we can always control our responses though. If we focus on what we can control we will be better and better in managing the situations.
Kenneth,
I agree with what you said. Having the right mindset is key. If we have the right mindset we can see the situations differently and even use them as opportunities to grow ourselves.
Comment by Jane
#7 4. October 2007, 8:27 am o'clock |
great tips but only need that all people to learn this rules
Comment by Donald Latumahina
#8 5. October 2007, 10:17 am o'clock |
Thanks, Jane. It’s indeed great if everyone can learn them, but at least we can start with ourselves.
Comment by Bipin
#9 31. December 2007, 2:53 am o'clock |
Nice tips, Are all of the tips given by your own personal experience?
Comment by Donald Latumahina
#10 31. December 2007, 10:06 pm o'clock |
Well, yes. To write this post, I extracted the lessons I got from negative situations I encountered throughout the years.
Comment by Louise Aspden
#11 9. January 2008, 7:33 pm o'clock |
You have a great list of tips here!
I would like to add one if you don’t mind. It is the piece about finding relief. Sometimes, if a situation has us upset we don’t have the cognitive or emotional ability to move back to where we had been.
We can however, find one thing within the situation, or the person to focus on that will make us feel just a little relief.
Relief is the path to attracting more joy.
With Gratitude…
Comment by Razvan Dobre
#12 12. August 2008, 5:09 pm o'clock |
I like your article, especially no. 14 in this list.
You are very correct: the more you evolve, the tougher the situations will become. But without these negative happenings our life would be just joy and fun, and even if this sounds great, we wouldn’t learn anything at all. It’s the hard times that teach us a lesson.
I embrace you Donald and thank you again,
Razvan
Comment by Donald Latumahina
#13 19. August 2008, 11:57 pm o'clock |
Razvan,
That’s the truth though it’s not convenient. I like to think of it like training our muscles. Only hard training will grow our muscles.
Thanks for sharing, Razvan!
Comment by editor
#14 13. September 2008, 5:23 am o'clock |
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15 Tips to Stay Positive in Negative Situations
Comment by RK
#15 28. September 2008, 9:46 pm o'clock |
These tips i must say are amazing. I just came into my room like a little girl, ready to cry and i googled how to stay positive and it worked like a charm:). Thank you!
Comment by morris p. mctities
#16 16. October 2008, 10:43 am o'clock |
how tha heck do you co-inside with a family who is struggling to get there own self on track?
Comment by sharon
#17 14. March 2009, 6:51 am o'clock |
go serve someone you are angry with. buy them gifts. send them encouraging letters. greet them with a big smile even if in your heart u feel like strangling them. do these things and other good things for them continuosly. if u believe in God, then pray for them, ask God to bless them and give them happiness.
Comment by imran
#18 27. April 2009, 7:08 am o'clock |
10 Tips to making good friend from from neighbours
Some Time when you want to make friendship with any person, but you feel bit scary and tensed to ask about making friendship, actually that time you’re not sure that whether he/she will accept you as a friend or refused you, if he/she refused you then surely you will be much agree on ourselves and thinking for long time that why I have asked that, but here is some tips to get sure before asking that whether he/she will be interested in making friendship.
1) Note his/her daily activities for few days that when he/she go to school/office and at which time often he/she come back to home, then try to be presence there in front of him regularly, and stand near by his door.
2) After couple days he/she will start to notice you, and then if possible for you then pay hello to him, otherwise stand there silent.
3) After 1 or 2 weeks later, suddenly don’t stand in front of his/her home for couple of days, then he/she will trying to looking for you, because he/she will use to see regularly, now you’re in his/her routine, so if some thing missing from routine then surely he/she will start to thinking about you.
4) After few days start standing again for few days, that time in often case he/she will try to ask you how are you, otherwise he/she will give you some good expressing like smile, at that period you will be sure that he/she is interesting to making friendship with you, because he glad to see you back on his/her routine.
5) Now on next day start to pay “hello” to him/her, surely he/she replied you in good manner, and that is the beginning sign.
6) Now you will not be scary, day by day by paying hello to him/her frequently.
7) After couple of days on that routine, you will not come again for 2 / 3 days, and see his/her reaction, he/she will surely tensed worry about you, he/she will trying to looking your door several times, and mostly of peoples trying to knocking his/her door and asking some think like that do you have sugar / salt / matchbox please?
8) If you appear that time, then surely he/she will ask that are you OKAY? Why you were not standing at corridor?
9) And then say him, that due to some works at home, and then formula got succeed after next time, you peoples will start to communication slowly and after few days you will be a good friends.
10) After being a good friend showing that you’re very lucky to be his/her friend
Comment by Rahul
#19 23. October 2009, 1:08 am o'clock |
Thanks for these good tips… i m starting this with myself. Specially with two
1] Never respond when you are not calm — This will help me to overcome my anger(1st of 3 negative thing in me)..
2] Sometimes you need to just let some people go… This will help me to overcome my emotional nature (2nd of 3 negative thing in me)….
I believe that if i can conquer these than i can conquer myself.
Also to every1 reading these i want to share 1 (Albert Einstein’s not sure) quote which in turn can motivate them
“Thanks to all who said no to me, Its bcouz of them i did it myself”…
Sooner you understand this and implement in your life ,you will see a change in your attitude towards whatever you do.
Thanks to all once again..
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# 19. September 2007, 10:50 am o'clock |
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