Why does it happen? Why don’t people do what is right to do? There are three reasons for that:

1. They don’t know what is right to do.
2. They know what is right to do  but underestimate its importance.
3. They know it’s important but procrastinate doing it.

In this post I will focus on the first and second reasons. For the third reason you can read defeating procrastination habit or my review of The Now Habit.

The first and second reasons have cost me time again and again. One example in blogging is regarding Amazon Associates program. Since the early days of my blogging I often write about the books I read. Some of the posts (like 37 Lessons to Help You Live a Life that Matters and 106 Tips to Become a Master Connector) became popular and attracted a lot of visitors. But I didn’t know that I could earn commissions by referring people to Amazon through those post. Only after blogging for almost one year did I realize that and join Amazon Associates.

Experiences like this teach me that to save time I need to prevent such things from happening again in the future. I must find the right things to do and do them.

Here are some tips to save time by finding the right things to do:

1. Expand your knowledge

The first thing you should do is expanding your knowledge. If you don’t even know that something exists then there is nothing you can do about it. That’s why it’s important that you get as many options as possible on your radar. You can do this by regularly reading books, magazines, and blogs in your field. You can also read materials from other fields - whether they are related or not - so that you can cross-pollinate ideas. Of course, reading is just one way to expand knowledge. There are other ways like watching videos, attending seminars, and joining professional organizations.

2. Write down all potential ideas

While expanding your knowledge, you will find potential ideas along the way. Write down all of them in your idea journal. The act of writing makes the ideas sink deeper into your mind. You should write not only the ideas that incrementally improve your way of doing things but also the ideas that could radically change the way you do things. I often get such ideas from unrelated fields and experiences.

3. Take the ideas seriously

This is where I often make mistakes. It deals with the second reason above: knowing what is right to do but underestimating its importance. To overcome it, whenever you encounter an idea ask yourself: what if the idea is right? What consequences will it have on my way of doing things? Perhaps there is no consequences right now, but what are the potential consequences five or ten years from now?

4. Find the ideas that have the biggest potential regret for you

Since you have only limited resources (whether they are time, money, or energy) and most likely many potential ideas, you should choose only a few of them that are most promising to implement. My favorite way of doing this is by assessing the potential regret I would have if I didn’t implement an idea.

Imagine yourself years from now looking back. What can you potentially regret if you don’t implement the idea? Questioning potential consequences as you do in #3 should help you find the regret level you could have if you don’t implement it.

So here is a key question to choose the few ideas to look deeper into:

Which ideas - assuming the ideas are right - could make you regret the most if you don’t implement them?

5. Investigate the ideas

Now that you have a few promising ideas, you should look deeper into them. Get as much information as possible about them. Ask or learn from people who already apply them. Use the questions what, why, when, where, who, and how to guide your investigation:

• What is the idea?
• Why should I apply the idea? Why is it good?
• When should I apply the idea?
• Where can I apply the idea?
• Who should apply the idea? To whom should the idea be applied?
• How should I apply the idea?

If possible, find multiple viewpoints for the questions so that you get complete view of the idea.

6. Test the most promising ideas

From your investigation you will get one or two most promising ideas. Now what you need to do is testing them in the real world. Apply the ideas. Incorporate them into what you do. Find out by yourself whether or not the ideas work. Some of them will fail but that’s how you improve yourself to save time in the future.

***

These tips will help you save time in the long term. As you’ve seen, the idea is to minimize your potential regret. Minimizing your potential regret has nothing to do with playing safe. Instead, it requires you to take risks here and there.

Photo by Michel Filion

Post from: Life Optimizer

How to Save Time in the Long Term

Abundance is, in large part, an attitude.
Sue Patton Thoele

Living an abundant life is everyone’s dream. We all want to live a prosperous life where we can be happy and fulfilled. While it may seem difficult for some people, in reality we already have what it takes to live an abundant life. As the quote above says, the most important ingredient for abundance is attitude and your attitude is something you can control.

With that in mind, here are nine tips to help you live an abundant life:

1. Have abundance mentality

Abundance mentality says that there is enough for everyone, so someone else’s gain is not your loss. This is the opposite of scarcity mentality which says that there is only a fixed amount of reward so someone else’s gain is your loss.

By having abundance mentality, you won’t feel envy when someone else succeeds. You know that you can have your own success.

2. Be grateful for what you have

More than anything else, being abundant is about how you see life. Some people may have everything but they still feel poor. Some other may have fewer but they feel abundant. You need to look at what you already have and be grateful for them instead of complaining for things you don’t have. Some people need to go through painful loss before they can appreciate what they have. Don’t let that happen to you. Here are some things to be grateful for.

3. Smile

I know it sounds simple, but smiling is an easy way to change the tone of your day. Even if your day doesn’t go as good as expected, you can always choose to respond positively. By smiling you are sending a positive message to yourself and others that you are a winner in life.

4. Start your days right

How you start your days greatly influences how they will be. That’s why you should make sure that you start your days right. While only you can define how to start your days right, here are some ideas:

• Rise early
• Get out of the bed right away
• Meditate or pray
• Exercise

5. Prepare yourself for opportunities

The way you use opportunities that come your way matters a great deal. Those who know how to best use opportunities will advance faster in life than those who don’t.

The first thing you should do is preparing yourself for opportunities so that you are ready when they come. Here are some things you can do to prepare for opportunities:

• Know your strengths
  The opportunities you get could be unexpected, but most likely they’re related to your strengths. So it’s essential that you know what your strengths are. Books like Now, Discover Your Strengths and StrengthsFinder 2.0 have tests that can help you identify your strengths.
• Develop your skills
  After identifying your strengths, you should develop skills that are relevant to them. See 7 Essential Tips for Developing Skills for more on it.
• Be observant
  Open your eyes and your ears. Be on the lookout for opportunities. The best opportunities are those that are overlooked by others.

6. Make the most out of every opportunity

Once you have an opportunity, explore the full extent of it. Don’t let it pass half-used. Is there other ways to use it? Can you combine it with something you already have to create something new? Can it open related opportunities?

7. Build friendships along the way

Relationships give you a lot of joy in life. It’s through relationships that you love and be loved. Furthermore, you can get the help you need from your network of friends. 106 Tips to Become a Master Connector has some tips you might find useful.

8. Build upon what you’ve built

The easiest way to achieve greater things in life is to build upon what you’ve built. Rather than starting again from scratch, leverage what you already have to jump to the next level.

This applies to many aspects of life. For example:

• You can apply for a better job based on the resume you’ve built.
• You can cross promote a new business to the customers of your existing businesses.
• You can find new connections through the network of friends you have.

9. Enjoy your life

Living an abundant life means you should be able to enjoy your life now without waiting for something big in the future. You don’t need certain amount of money or certain level of success to be happy. You can be happy right now with what you have. Read 30 Simple Ways to Enjoy Life for some ideas on how to enjoy life.

Photo by Sir Mervs

Post from: Life Optimizer

9 Tips to Live an Abundant Life

I’ve been thinking about this subject for a while and I’ve come to a perspective that I’m about to share with you. This perspective helps me connect making money to a greater purpose and makes it more fulfilling.

The Goals of Making Money

Why do people make money? What do they try to achieve? I believe there are two levels of goals in making money: a lower one and a higher one.

The lower goal of making money is to meet your needs.

This is the goal that most people has and there is nothing wrong with it. I also have it as a goal since I do have needs that can only be met with money.

But there is a higher goal.

The higher goal of making money is to make yourself useful to a cause you believe in.

While the lower goal of making money sits on level 1 (Physical) or 4 (Esteem) of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, the higher goal sits on level 8 (Transcendence). Consequently, the higher goal is more fulfilling. It’s fine to have the lower goal of making money, but I believe that sooner or later we must adopt the higher goal.

Of course, you can be useful to your cause in many ways. Being useful financially is just one of them. You may want to be useful to your cause in non-financial ways and that’s absolutely fine.

In my case though, I want to contribute financially as well as in other ways.

Now I will share with you what I think is the best way to be useful financially to your cause.

Being Useful Financially To Your Cause

There is one thing that makes you useful financially to your cause : the ability to make money.

Notice that I say the ability to make money and not the amount of money you have.

This, I believe, is an essential principle when it comes to making money:

Having the ability to make money is more important than having money.

It’s not how much you have. It’s how much you can make. There are three reasons why the ability to make money is more important than having money:

1. By having the ability to make money, you won’t be obsessed with having a lot of money because you know that you can always earn the money when you need it.
2. By having the ability to make money, you can easily give money away. Again, that’s because you know that you can earn the money when you need it.
3. By having the ability to make money, you can share your knowledge on how to make money rather than just giving the money itself.

This way you can be useful to your cause in three ways:

1. You have the time to do important things for your cause that aren’t related to making money. That’s because you aren’t so obsessed with having money that your time is occupied with work.
2. Your money can directly help the cause because you’re willing to give it away.
3. You can help other people earn more money. They can then be useful financially to the cause and thereby create a multiplier effect.

As you can see, you are useful in many ways if you have the ability to make money. That’s why you should focus on increasing your ability to make money.

In a future post, I will discuss how to do that.

Photo by jenn_jenn

Post from: Life Optimizer

Making Money With a Purpose

I still accept guest posts though. Please see Guest Posting Guidelines for more information about it.

Let’s now look at what happened in October.

Best Posts

There were nine posts published in October. The most visited posts were:

• 7 Winning Character Traits That Create A Lifetime Of Success
• Self Motivation: How to Motivate Yourself

Guest Posts

We have four guest posts last month:

• Networking Can Get You A Job Promotion by Andrew Rondeau of Great Management
• 7 Winning Character Traits That Create A Lifetime Of Success by Shamelle Perera of The Enhance Life
• Hold Your Horses! Developing Patience in a 24/7 World by Sid Savara of SidSavara.com
• Attitude Adjustment: A Good Sense of Humor Will Make You a Winner by Winston Cole of Plan My Cruise Vacation

For Andrew, Shamelle, Sid, and Winston: thanks!

One Year Before

Looking back to October 2007, the most visited posts were:

• 48 Best Classic Books to Read
• 8 Tips to Minimize Stress and Be Content with Your Life

Post from: Life Optimizer

Monthly Roundup of October 2008

I set out to find the common pattern behind all successful growth efforts, to identify a complete set of core principles that would be universally applicable.

The principles must be something that can be applied to your health as well as your relationships, your career as well as your finance.

Does the book succeed? Let’s see.

Inside Personal Development for Smart People

The book begins with an explanation of the universal principles:

It took me almost two and a half years, but I eventually found the solution I was looking for. It consists of just three core principles: truth, love, and power. Four secondary principles are directly derived from the first three: oneness, authority, courage, and intelligence. Oneness is truth plus love. Authority is truth plus power. Courage is love plus power. And intelligence is the total combination of truth, love, and power.

These principles form the foundation for the rest of the book.

The book is divided into two parts with a total of 13 chapters. The first part explains the seven principles one by one, while the second part explains practical applications of those principles in several areas of life.

Part I. Fundamental Principles

1. Truth

Truth is the first core principle of personal growth. If you want to grow, you must first recognize where you are and accept it as it is. Only then can you take action to take your life to a better position.

Some of the things that may block you from truth are media conditioning, false beliefs, and addictions. You can become more truthful through exercises like self assessment, journaling, and media fasting.

2. Love

The essence of love is connecting. To become more loving, you should be willing to connect with others. To connect here means to think about them and to give them your attention.

It’s a simple but nice way to describe love. Just try it yourself. Give someone else your genuine attention and you’ll feel the existence of love there.

3. Power

Power is your ability to create the world around you. It’s your ability to make things happen. Some components of power are responsibility, focus, effort, and self-discipline.

There are a lot of good ideas in this chapter to help you make things happen. For example, the point of goal setting is to improve the quality of your present moment. It’s useless to create goals that doesn’t help you do better in the present.

Also, it’s important to build your self-discipline. You need motivation to start, but self discipline is what you need to finish.

4. Oneness

Oneness is a secondary principle that comes from combining truth and love. Oneness is the awareness that you’re connected with everybody else. While love is about choosing to connect, oneness is about knowing that you’re already connected.

When you look from the point of view of oneness, what is good for others is also good for you and vice versa. Consequently, things like honesty and compassion will naturally flow out of you.

5. Authority

Authority is a secondary principle that comes from combining truth and power. Having authority means having the clarity of how you want your life to be and having the power to make it happen.

To exercise authority, you must take responsibility for your life. You need to do what matters to you and measure the effectiveness of your effort. You can then use the feedback to adjust your actions.

6. Courage

Courage is a secondary principle that comes from combining love and power. To be courageous is to confront fear with the power that comes from your deepest connections.

A major part of being courageous is to follow your heart. Whenever you feel that you’re no longer connected with your heart, stop and  ask yourself: Where is the path with a heart? Then have the courage to follow the path.

7. Intelligence

Intelligence is a secondary principle that comes from combining the three core principles: truth, power, and love. Consequently, the definition of intelligence is alignment with truth, love, and power.

An important of part of being intelligent is to master the art of creative self-expression. You should be able to share what is most important to you (your message) in the right way for you (your medium). The medium here, for instance, could be writing, speaking, or painting.

Part II. Practical Applications

This part applies the seven principles covered in Part I to several areas of your life: habits, career, money, health, relationships, and spirituality. There are plenty of specific techniques in each chapter that I can’t possibly cover here.

Conclusion

Personal Development for Smart People is a thought-provoking book. While the principles in the book are not new, the book arranges and connects the principles in a clear and concise way. I especially like the way the four secondary principles are derived from the three primary ones.

Honestly, there are some views in the book that I disagree. That being said, Personal Development for Smart People contains a lot of ideas that are useful for personal growth. I plan to apply many of them to my life. It also has a creative way of looking at some issues (like goal setting in chapter 3) that makes me rethink my approach on them.

This article is part of October 2008 theme: Winning Attitude

Post from: Life Optimizer

Review: Personal Development for Smart People

A sense of humor can help you overlook the unattractive, tolerate the unpleasant, cope with the unexpected, and smile through the unbeatable
Moshe Waldoks

My sense of humor helped me survive

When I immigrated to the United States in 1992 it was very tough for me. I had left a very lucrative job in my home, left behind my wife and two young children. The US then was going through a recession period similar to what we are experiencing now. I could not find work in my field. I sent out countless job applications without success. I took the advice of a family friend who suggested I look for work in the teaching field. Me teach?

It was Alberta Flanders who said that “Sometimes only a change of view point is needed to convert a tiresome duty into an interesting opportunity.” Instead of thinking about quitting and never to look back, you can look at a difficult and stressful situation and laugh. Ask yourself “Is this an obstacle or an opportunity?” Why not see yourself as one of the crazy few who stay to take a second go at this? Think of Mahatma Gandhi who said “If I had no sense of humor I should long ago have committed suicide.”

With very little attempt I was able to secure a teaching position. I started teaching in a special education school for trouble kids.  These students were very difficult to control. Most new teachers stayed less than a week and quit. Funny how we can get help from strange places. In my case it was the old lady who was a cook in the school. She challenged me by asking me whether I was going to let the kids run me out of the school.  I changed my perspective and saw this as an opportunity and not an obstacle. I started to laugh at myself when the kids call me names and try to make me angry. Soon I was able to win their hearts.

Humor is my sword and my shield, it protects me. You can open a door with humor and drive a truck right through.
Alan Simpson

After a ten year spell in teaching I decided it was time to get back to my engineering career. But first I must get my professional registration. I took the national board examination and failed some sections. I was again ready to give up. My hopes and will power almost died when I received my test scores. Again thanks to a true friend who brought it to my attention that so many people have failed and continue to retake the test. This friend confided in me that he too had to retake the test more than once to obtain his license.

I weighed the situation and burst out laughing. I of all should know better. As a teacher I have seen so many students give up because they failed the first time. Instead of realizing that they failed because they did not put in the time or effort to prepare well, they labeled themselves “no good” and acted the part of a no good fellow. If only we can remember to laugh at our self when we fail, the solution will be easy. Always look for an answer to, “what do I need to do to turn things around from failure to success?”  So I not only registered to take the board exam once more,  but also enrolled in a preparatory class. This class did wonders for my test taking skills.

Success is my best revenge

Look for ways to get back at those who have rejected you in your early attempt. I could recall in my school days a teacher who told me I would never amount to anything good… This alone was a great motivator. To all such folks, I say success is my best revenge. After graduating as an engineer, I came across my teacher who had told me I would never amount to anything good. I helped her complete a building project on her home. This was after she had had so much trouble with construction workers. I did this without charging her a cent. Success was my revenge. If you have a good sense of humor, success can be your best revenge. It can be a driving force to make you want to go on and win big time. When the tough times come, see it as a joke. Keep your eyes on the prize.  The harder the battle the sweeter will be the victory.

How good humor can benefit you?

Studies have shown that laughter and good humor can help us protect our attitude and steer us in the path of happiness. When we introduce good humor and laughter into our dealings with others we are shutting negative thoughts and actions and this helps us lead individuals to making good judgment.

Good humor and laughter benefit us in many ways. Laughter makes us relax and helps us relieve stress. A good sense of humor and the ability to laugh during stressful situation reduces the harmful effect of emotional distress. Instead of intensifying our anxiety, laughter makes us less anxious.

Laughter and humor strengthen our immune systems. Good humor and laughter helps to reduce stress, lowers blood pressure and elevate our temperament. Humor and laughter really assist in getting rid of negative emotions such as anger, depression and anxiety.

Good humor and laughter can make us livelier and increase our energy level. We become more alert, more lively and happy.

Having a good sense of humor will help you bridge the gap between people. Especially if you are dealing with stressful or difficult subject.   Add some good humor by making fun of yourself. You will observe that the recipient will take the message with better spirit. Laughter develops and heals relationships as people who laugh together bond together by sharing a common thread.

How you can develop and acquire good sense of humor?

To develop a sense of humor start to smile a lot.  Smile at every occasion. Look at the bright side of things.

Always seek the good in whatever dire circumstance you find yourself facing.

Avoid negative people as they can drain your energy and suck the positive life out of you.

Do not take yourself seriously. Laugh at your failures and ask your self what can I learn from this?

Avoid sarcastic humor. Put the joke on you not on anyone else. Do not try to laugh at other people’s expense. You will appear insensitive and wicked.

Good sense of humor is a key element to developing a winning attitude. Start by making small adjustment.

I love the man that can smile in trouble, that can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection.
Thomas Paine

Follow these and you will win

Smile and remember, even the seasons change.  As long as we are alive we will experience this fact. It happens to young or old. It happens in love and war. Things change. The situation or the tide will turn. A weak opponent can develop strength or a good friend can abandon our cause and desert us.  Be prepared for rejections and just believe if you take it long enough things eventually change just like the seasons do. Winter leads to spring then summer and fall.

Smile and remember dreams do come true. Though it is not usually at the first attempt. The seed has to be planted, watered, and nurtured with plenty of sun before it can grow. All of this takes time.

We are always free to make choices but accept that we are not free from our choices.

Never be too old or too big to learn.  We can learn from every one. As a teacher I learned a lot from my young students. As an engineer I learned a lot from the unschooled laborers I get the privilege to work with.

Look for the good in unpleasant situations

Laugh a lot and believe your efforts will not go in vain.  Have faith.  Very few people will persistently work hard and not get rewarded for their effort.

Try to be at peace with every one you encounter. Avoid burning the bridge we have crossed.  Life has a funny way of bringing us back where we started.

It’s not over till its over. Miracle can happen and that may be to you.

Seek and ye shall find. View life as a journey and not as a destination. Try to enjoy every moment. As you go through life remember the words of Dorothy Canfield Fisher who said “Humor…. Like good cheese, mellowed and ripened by age”.

As Amy Alcott said “Keep your sense of humor. There’s enough stress in the rest of your life to let bad shots ruin a game you’re supposed to enjoy.”

Winston Cole is a Civil Engineer and Special Educator. He is an avid traveler and publisher with sites including http://www.planmycruisevacation.com/ and http://www.exquisite-engagement-rings.com/engagement_rings_articles.html. Winston’s love for people is obvious. He bridges the gap between people’s goals and dreams. Winston enjoys playing sports, chess and  traveling on cruises around the world.

This article is part of October 2008 theme: Winning Attitude

Photo by pockeywiley

Post from: Life Optimizer

Attitude Adjustment: A Good Sense of Humor Will Make You a Winner

People who are unable to motivate themselves must be content with mediocrity, no matter how impressive their other talents.
Andrew Carnegie

If you want to excel in life, self motivation is essential. You must know how to motivate yourself. You must be able to keep your spirit high no matter how discouraging a situation is. That’s the only way to get the power you need to overcome difficulties. Those who are discouraged in difficult times are certain to lose even before the battle is over.

The question is: how do you motivate yourself? Here are several tips I’ve found to be effective to build self motivation:

1. Have a cause

I can’t think of a more powerful source of motivation than a cause you care about. Such cause can inspire you to give your best even in the face of difficulties. It can make you do the seemingly impossible things.

While other causes could inspire you temporarily, a cause that matters to you can inspire you indefinitely. It’s a spring of motivation that will never dry. Whenever you think that you run out of motivation,  you can always come to your cause to get a fresh dose of motivation.

2. Have a dream. A big dream.

Only as high as I reach can I grow, only as far as I seek can I go, only as deep as I look can I see, only as much as I dream can I be.
Karen Ravn

Your cause is a powerful source of motivation but it’s still abstract in nature. You need to make it concrete in the form of a dream. Imagine how the world will be in the future. Imagine how people will live and work.

Having a dream is important because it’s difficult to be motivated if you don’t have anything to shoot for. Just think about people who play basketball. Will they be motivated to play if there is no basket to aim at? I don’t think so. They need a goal. You need a goal. That’s what your dream is for.

But just having a dream is insufficient. Your dream must be big enough to inspire you. It must be realistic but challenging. It must stretch your ability beyond your comfort zone.

3. Be hungry

Wanting something is not enough. You must hunger for it. Your motivation must be absolutely compelling in order to overcome the obstacles that will invariably come your way.
Les Brown

To be truly motivated, you need to have hunger and not just desire. Having mere desire won’t take you through difficult times since you don’t want things badly enough. In many cases, hunger makes the difference between the best performers and the mediocre ones.

How can you have hunger? Your cause and your dream play a big role here. If you have a cause you care about and a big dream related to it, you should have the hunger inside of you. If you think that you are losing hunger, all you need to do is to connect again to your cause and dream. Let them inspire you and bring the hunger back.

4. Run your own race

I do not try to dance better than anyone else. I only try to dance better than myself.
Mikhail Baryshnikov

Comparing yourself with others is an effective way to demotivate yourself. Even if you start with enthusiasm, you will soon lose your energy when you compare yourself with others.

Don’t let that happen to you. You have your own race so how other people perform is irrelevant. Comparing yourself with others is like comparing the performance of a swimmer with a runner using the same time standard. They are different so how can you compare one with the other?

The only competitor you have is yourself. The only one you need to beat is you. Have you become the best you can be?

5. Take one more step

Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.
Winston Churchill

When you meet obstacles along the way, there could be the tendency to quit. You may think that it’s too difficult to move on. You may think that your dream is impossible to achieve. But this is where you can see the difference between winners and losers. Though both of them face the same difficulties, there is one thing that makes the winners different: the courage to continue.

In difficult situations, just focus on taking one more step forward. Don’t think about how to complete the race. Don’t think about how many more obstacles are waiting for you. Just focus on taking the next step.

6. Let go of the past

Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Believe it or not, one of the best demotivators is your past. Your past can drag you down before you realize it. Your past can give you a heavy burden on your shoulders.

The good news is it’s a burden you don’t have to carry. Take it off your shoulder and leave it. You might make mistakes in the past. You might disappoint others with what you did. But it’s over. It’s already in the past and there’s nothing you can do about it.

Today is a new day and you have the chance to start again. No matter how bad your past might be, you still have a bright future ahead waiting for you. Just don’t let the burden of the past stop you.

***

Apply these tips and motivate yourself. Don’t settle for mediocrity. Let your self motivation take you to excellence.

This article is part of October 2008 theme: Winning Attitude

Photo by bingbing

Post from: Life Optimizer

Self Motivation: How to Motivate Yourself

Instant gratification isn’t fast enough for me
Carrie Fisher

Everywhere you turn, the world is moving faster and we’re expecting things sooner.  Think about how many times a day you hear or say something like this:

• I’ll need that ASAP.
• Can you FedEx that next-day please? How about same day?
• Two Big Macs to go please – and make it quick.

We live in a 24/7/365 world, learning how to fit 12 hours of work into 8 hours days – working smarter not harder, and we want everything now, now, now.  Where we once said hold your head up, keep a positive attitude, we now say – can I get that sooner?

We are bombarded by commercials every day that ask us:  Do you want to lose weight quickly?  How about get rich fast?  All this and more, just 19.95 plus shipping and handling, in 30 days guaranteed or your money back! And of course, the fine print: *Results not typical.

The fact is, there is no free lunch, and when it sounds too good to be true, it usually is.

Overnight Success Rarely Happens Overnight

So often we think of people that are overnight successes, but the truth is many were laying the foundation for success their whole lives.  Take Tim Ferris as an example – the 4 Hour Work Week author was an overnight phenomenon a year ago, and seemingly came out of nowhere.  As he has related in interviews though, his overnight success was anything but.  He pitched his book to 15 publishers, because 14 rejected him.  His promotional campaign was virtually all grassroots: he went to conferences where bloggers were gathering, formed real friendships, and then asked if they would mind reviewing his book.  The overnight success was months, if not years, in the making.

We like to imagine that the reason others succeed and we don’t is because they happened to be in the right place at the right time, and opportunity presented itself.  While that may be true in some cases, more often than not those who succeed are people who have maintained a positive attitude and patience in the face of obstacles, and in spite of setbacks remained determined: preparing for the opportunity they knew would come.

Be Patient – And Prepare!

It is better to be prepared for an opportunity and not have one than to have an opportunity and not be prepared.
Whitney Young, Jr.

A charming story that illustrates this point appears in Chicken Soup for the Soul – Living Your Dreams by Jack Canfield. The whole book is filled with inspiring stories and worth the read, but my favorite appears on page 230.

Canfield tells the story of Les Brown – a young, hungry wannabe disc jockey that was turned down week after week by the station manager.  Finally, the station manager relented and hired him: as an errand boy, without pay.  Undeterred, he believed in his dream, kept a positive attitude and in his room at night he practiced what it would be like to be on the air: what he would say, how to work the controls, his on air persona.  He continued to believe in his dream, and had the patience, determination and positive attitude to remain at the station as an errand boy, knowing his opportunity would come.  He hung out with the other DJs, absorbed their knowledge and learned everything he could about the controls and how they worked on the air.

One day a DJ got too drunk to continue.  Any other person in his situation, working as an errand boy at the station, likely would have gone into the control room, perhaps announced the station would be off air for a little while, and continued working as an errand boy at the station – but not Les Brown. Les was prepared, knew his lines, and hungry to be on air.  He grabbed his opportunity, and from the second he got his hands on the microphone knew what he was going to say and delivered. He kept a positive attitude in the face of adversity, and was able to make the most out of his opportunity because he was patient and ensured he would be in the right place at the right time.  He wowed his station manager, family and the audience with his performance and went on to have a successful career in broadcasting.

The Slowness Movement

As an added bonus, you may enjoy Carl Honore’s talk at the TED conference in praise of the slowness movement.  It’s where I first heard the Carrie Fisher quote that opened this article, and is a wonderful way to spend 20 minutes opening your mind to developing patience, and taking the time to enjoy the small pleasures in life.

Sid Savara, founder of the personal development and productivity site SidSavara.com, writes about improving your life, achieving your goals and finding more time for yourself.   Check out Sid’s recent post about paying yourself first, by using your most productive hours to focus on your goals: More Important than Money - Paying Myself First With My Time

This article is part of October 2008 theme: Winning Attitude

Post from: Life Optimizer

Hold Your Horses! Developing Patience in a 24/7 World

Self development plays an important role here. Only through self development can you put yourself in a position where you defeat poverty in all areas of your life. Self development grows your capacity so that you are bigger than the situation you face. It helps you overcome all kinds of poverty in your life.

In this post I’d like to share some self development tips to help you overcome the four kinds of poverty. Here they are:

Material

1. Increase your knowledge

It’s important that you consume the right information when it comes to career and personal finance. Otherwise you may get wrong advice that leads you into trouble. Here are three good books on career and personal finance I recommend you to read:

• What Color is Your Parachute?
• Your Money or Your Life
• The Bogleheads’ Guide to Investing

2. Develop your skills

Developing your skills is important to increase your earning potential. Read 7 Essential Tips for Developing Skills for more information on how to do it.

3. Manage your finance

You need to manage your income and expenses. The first step to do that is to take note of every transaction you do. I already have this habit since I first worked and it helps me a lot in my personal finance. It allows me to know exactly what my current personal finance situation is. This way I know if I overspend on something and quickly get it under control.

Spiritual

4. Find your purpose

You need to find your purpose in life because it gives you meaning and direction in everything you do. Read A Guide to Finding Your Life Purpose for more tips on it.

5. Build a spiritual habit

Just like you should regularly exercise to maintain your physical health, you should also have a spiritual habit to grow your spiritual health. Depending on your spiritual belief, the habit could be praying, meditating, and reading sacred texts, among others. The important thing here is to make it a habit.

Physical

6. Build the exercise habit

You need regular exercise to manage your energy. Regular exercise helps you maintain high-energy state during your days so that you can perform best.

7. Get enough rest

I was surprised when I first read about the power of nap in How to Stop Worrying and Start Living. Even seemingly short nap can restore your energy and make you more productive. I know it’s not always possible to take a nap, but the point is you should have enough rest to get your energy back.

Social

8. Prioritize relationships

Put relationships as your top priority. It requires you to sacrifice here and there which is not easy but that’s how you build a fulfilling life. One of the best signs that you prioritize relationships is you provide time for others. The time you provide might not be long, but spending quality time with others will boost your relationships with them.

***

While short, these tips can help your self development. You can then fight effectively against the four kinds of poverty in your life.

What do you think? Do you have other tips to fight life poverty?

This article is part of October 2008 theme: Winning Attitude

Photo by notsogoodphotography

Post from: Life Optimizer

Fighting Life Poverty With Self Development

I am an ardent fan of the TV series The Big Idea. For the benefit of those of you who haven’t watched it, it is an interview which features a person who has made an idea they once had, a success. Most of them have started with literally just the shirts on their backs but have later went to become great CEOs, property moguls, entrepreneurs, or media stars. Even with little or no money in their pockets - they STILL managed to have amazing success in their lives.

The show also interviews individuals who were written off as ‘too small’, ‘too slow’, or ‘not talented enough’ who went onto become Olympic champions, or top basketball, football, soccer, or baseball stars.

With each interview, I came to realize that it’s not really the talent, money, intelligence or the upbringing that enabled these people to become successful. (don’t misunderstand; I am not saying that these are not necessary!) There are other distinctive winning traits that enabled them achieve greater heights in life.

The list below is not an exhaustive list, of course—you could no doubt add to it. I hope that you’ll find it to be a helpful primer for how you can create a lifetime of success.

1.Driven by ambition (not fear of failure). How many times have you personally come across a business or an opportunity that you knew would be profitable and successful, but lacked the courage to invest the money or to step into the unknown?

Think about it, sometimes we need the courage to move forward without fear or doubt.

2. Winners are Doers. I know a lot of people who want greater things in life. They have the desire and the ambition but they are not willing to DO. Reality check: ‘I will get to it someday’ never works!

It is vital that you take affirmative action on an ongoing basis in order to fully achieve. Stop procrastinating and become an action taker.

3. Self-discipline to see it through. A co-worker put it very succinctly: Knowing how to lose weight is simple – fewer calories in, more calories out – but the discipline to do it is hard!

Regardless of whether you’re trying to stay on a diet, clean out the garage, or be more productive in your occupation, the secret to success revolves around your ability to recognize and deal with the part of you that offers resistance.

Self-discipline is NOT a personality trait that either you have or you don’t have. It is a skill that can be learned and developed.

The next time your self-discipline is about to go off track ask yourself, “How can I get myself to do what a part of me doesn’t want to do?”

4. Quitters never win and winners never quit (Persist, persist and persist). Calvin Coolidge couldn’t have said it better. “Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not: Nothing is more common than unrewarded talent. Education alone will not: The world is full of educated failures. Persistence alone is omnipotent.”

5. Do not sulk but learn. It’s impossible to get it right 100% of the time. It is because of your failure that you learn what works and what doesn’t. Criticizing yourself is not going to make any difference. Instead it would drain your energy and dissuade you.

While being determined is important, do not be so hard on yourself that you become critical of every move you make. Give yourself some room to make mistakes and be flexible. That does not mean you can miss goals but it does mean that if you do, find out how to avoid that from happening again.

6. Accept responsibility. You are responsible for what happens with your life. It’s not ok to blame the media, government or your parents for your mistakes and failures. If you keep blaming people you’ll soon learn that you let them control you, and when you realize this you’ll start taking responsibility for your own life and work towards your own success.

7. Adapt an “I can” attitude. The way you think, day in day out, affects all aspects of your life. Learning to listen to your “internal dialogue” will help you recognize your thought patterns and how they may be affecting the way you handle the stressful situations of daily living. Having a positive mental attitude will attract what you need to achieve your definite major purpose.

What’s your take on this? Why do you think others succeed where perhaps you haven’t (or at least to the degree that you wish you had)?

Shamelle Perera offers advice and tips on actionable personal development based on her incidental gleanings. Visit The Enhance Life and glimpse through The Enhance Life Archives.  You are bound to find an article that will suit your need.

This article is part of October 2008 theme: Winning Attitude

Photo by wili_hybrid

Post from: Life Optimizer

7 Winning Character Traits That Create A Lifetime Of Success