Comments on: How Personal Growth Can Uncover a Toxic Relationship

By: links for 2008-09-01 | Why I FAILED

links for 2008-09-01 | Why I FAILED — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 13:43:35 +0000

[...] How Personal Growth Can Uncover a Toxic Relationship | Life Optimizer This can definitely happen so beware. (tags: personal_development life success relationships) [...]

By: Theme for September 2008 and Monthly Roundup of August 2008

Theme for September 2008 and Monthly Roundup of August 2008 — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 10:40:43 +0000

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By: » Kosmic Life — Relationship Web Highlights: Toxic Relationships, Give and Take in Relationship, Relationship Quizzes

Fri, 26 Sep 2008 21:38:57 +0000

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By: EPIC SELF » Blog Archive » Link Love For Some Fab New Finds

EPIC SELF » Blog Archive » Link Love For Some Fab New Finds — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 22:38:55 +0000

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By: Links For Super-Charged Living - August 16, 2008 | My Super-Charged Life

Links For Super-Charged Living - August 16, 2008 | My Super-Charged Life — Sat, 16 Aug 2008 14:01:21 +0000

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By: Chris Edgar

Chris Edgar — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 20:49:42 +0000

Thanks for this inspiring post. One thing I’ve found on my own journey is how accurately the other people in the relationships I’m in seem to reflect my view of myself. When I first left my law firm to start my own business, for example, I had several friends who seemed to say discouraging things regularly about my prospects for succeeding on my own.

As I began to feel more solid in doing my various non-law activities, my friends seemed to feel more solid about what I was doing as well and stopped carping about it. It really hit home for me with this experience how strongly my reality reflects my own emotional state.

By: Study Matrix Blog - A Better Loving Relationship - 36 Critical Lessons | Mind Map

Fri, 15 Aug 2008 06:09:05 +0000

[...] How Personal Growth Can Uncover a Toxic Relationship @ Life Optimizer [...]

By: Flora Morris Brown, Ph.D.

Flora Morris Brown, Ph.D. — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 17:17:51 +0000

JoLynn,

I remember well my surprise at discovering in my early 30’s that some people, even relatives, didn’t have my higher good in mind. The hardest part of distancing myself from toxic people was changing the belief that a dysfunctional family and personal relationships was normal.

The great thing about growing in consciousness is not only do I see people and things more clearly, but I’m able to steer clear of unhealthy relationships. It’s not easy when some of these toxic people are close relations, but it’s absolutely essential to avoid them for my own well-being.

As for being part of the problem, we all are receiving some benefit–even though it’s wrapped in pain-when we stay in a toxic relationship. Once we can face our part in the dysfunction, we have opened the door to becoming healthier, even if that means ending the relationship.

By: Tom Stine | Life Coach

Tom Stine | Life Coach — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 13:07:05 +0000

Excellent article, JoLynn. Nice to see you again. I personally have experienced not the end to a “toxic” relationship, but a relationship that involved two people clearly heading in different directions. My ex and I were simply being moved to grow in opposite ways. So, we split up. And now we are both happier than ever. And our growth accelerated tremendously.

Great article…… Tom

By: JoLynn Braley

JoLynn Braley — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 18:34:24 +0000

Hi Donald, I’m so honored to be a guest poster on your site, thank you so much for having me here! :)

@Ari, thank you! And you said it right there - if a bad habit is the glue in a relationship (some people have addictions in common, for example) and that habit is dissolved by one party, then the relationship is no longer the same.

@Janelle, Have you heard of the 100th monkey theory? You could be the 100th monkey, meaning that it doesn’t necessarily take every single person on Earth to raise the global consciousness, although that would be great if everyone were improving themselves. ;)

Instead, just one person (the 100th monkey) can shift the whole consciousness by raising their own awareness. It really puts the responsibility on each of us to “do our part” doesn’t it? You don’t know if you could be the one to cause a global shift! :)

@Glen, you’re exactly right - the relationship can survive if each party is ready and willing to support each other in a positive manner and support each other’s personal growth instead of being threatened by it and attempting to put down the person who is growing. ;)