Comments on: How Bad Friends Can Help You Grow

By: Adil

Adil — Sun, 08 Mar 2009 14:18:02 +0000

I would accept this kind of advice for difficult colleagues, whom I have to learn to deal with. But I would NOT waste energy on building friendships with ‘difficult’ people, which are going to result in unbalanced, and ultimately unsatisfying relationships. You need to be a well-balanced and confident person to avoid getting emotionally thrown-off course by “bad friends” whose personalities clash enough to be a “challenge” to your character. But if you were that well-balanced in the first place, there would be no need to seek ‘bad friends’ for the purposes claims in the article.

The people you seek to ‘lever’ you up shouldn’t be “bad” friends. They should be people who have achieved what you aspire to achieve. Study their behaviours and see what they have done which are are not doing and can emulate.

By: juliee

juliee — Fri, 05 Dec 2008 03:49:16 +0000

hmm..i like this article..it give me a new perspective on how to handle people around me, rather than always be defensive (which i felt draining all my energy).it also a way of make out the positive out of negative situation..which is beneficial..is any other link or more info about this
character exercises..ive met enough of bully people…

By: sandy

sandy — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 05:36:23 +0000

I have a “friend” who wasn’t interested in a particular man until I was.. the other night she went up to him in the pub and straddled him.
There is no care in such a situation for me from her at all.
I beleieve any character building for me would come from choising not to have friends around me who simply have no care for me.
Am I missing something?

By: Monster & Workopolis - are these jobs ones that companies have trouble finding people for?

Sun, 24 Aug 2008 19:08:31 +0000

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By: Chuck

Chuck — Fri, 22 Aug 2008 14:34:32 +0000

I think this is the stupidest thing I’ve read all week. Wanna be friends?

By: Donald Latumahina

Donald Latumahina — Fri, 22 Aug 2008 11:21:13 +0000

Li,

Of course we shouldn’t actively seek “negative” people. What I’m saying is we should take advantage of all kinds of people around us for our personal growth, not just the “positive” type but also the “negative” type.

I don’t know about you, but in my life there are both people who are easy and difficult to deal with. Rather than just blaming people who are difficult to deal with, why don’t we see our interaction with them in a positive way?

By: Li

Li — Fri, 22 Aug 2008 03:32:36 +0000

So by your definition, I should not just befriend “positive” people but actively seek out “negative” people? And not only is it their problem that they are difficult to deal with but MY problem that I’m not patient enough with them? I don’t know what you definition character building is, but good luck in your pursuit in becoming a doormat.

By: Donald Latumahina

Donald Latumahina — Wed, 20 Aug 2008 03:38:04 +0000

Aries,
Thanks for stopping by.

Every men we met or yet to come have a purpose in our life.

I agree with you. That’s a good way to look at it.

By: Aries

Aries — Sun, 17 Aug 2008 14:22:06 +0000

Nice article Don. Well if we think positively, those “bad friends” only “different” from our nature, maybe the way we think, the way we act, etc.

I believe in everything there are causes and effects. Every men we met or yet to come have a purpose in our life. Well at least that’s what I believe. ^_^ Cheers.

By: Donald Latumahina

Donald Latumahina — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 01:47:29 +0000

Flora,
Everyone is different, of course. I can still learn a lot through them.